Oh, for Blog's sake.

I have stories, some of which I've shared on other public blogging type things, so I think I'll start posting them here every now and again. This one's just a little over a year old, was relevant to the new job I had at the time:

Ok, so I have this relatively new job, a month or so, and like any other job I have a few bosses.

Let me rewind it a bit, Tarrantino style and explain.

I am working for this company, who will remain unnamed for legal and job keeping purposes, whose main responsibility is canvassing for various causes. Right now, we are canvassing for health care (once again, not saying what we were for, for various legal reasons.). The way the office is set up is one canvass director, basically the top boss, two field managers, secondary bosses, and the canvassers.

We're a new office. We will eventually have 4-5 field managers, but for now we have 2. One of which is going to Albuquerque for a month to cross train, right after the new year. SO, our one remaining Field Manager, the other night, gets the urge to poo. I never asked him the level of poo it was, but it must have been pretty severe, because while we were out, some random guy came out and caught him pooing on the side of his house.

We split up into teams to canvass neighborhoods, and unfortunately, I wasn't with this bowelly challenged soul. The police report said, however, that a man was found to be defecating on the side of a civillian's house. Down the block, when approached, the young man who was in tandem with the defacator, claimed to be in league with him, though denied knowledge of the defecator's defacating.

By the way, the guy that caught him had a gun that he flashed a few times, tucked in the elastic of his sweatpants.

Flash forward 30 minutes later, and I'm ready to be picked up. I hop in the van and immediately tell the first and only story of interest of the night, unaware of what had transpired with my colleagues: "I had to poo so damn bad. I jogged a block to a gas station, but their bathroom was out. Then I went to the Sonic next door, asked if there was anything I could buy that could gain me entrance to their crapper; Sadly there was not. So I walk/jogged a half a mile down the road to a Minsky's Pizza and Pub, where the man didn't even make me buy anything, just let me poop for free."

As it turns out, my innocent story of searching for a place to poo may have sealed this poor defecator's fate. Had we been somewhere that had no accessible or reachable shitter, it might have been different. But my story of overcoming anti-shitism combined with the fact that the guy SHIT ON THE SIDE OF A HOUSE, pretty much all contribute to his career with ******** ***** coming to an end.

Drunk time, which means new post for you-all.

Y'all remember that time you had a pet lizard, but it didn't seem to want to live? It's like, it climbed all over it's cage, but never hunkered down and prepared it's life in a 5"X5" cage made of mesh?

Right, you know the one. It held a chameleon that wasn't very good at chameleoning. That one.

Anywho, I heard a story the other day that made me think of my old lizard, and don't ask me why.

Apparently my Grandmother was watching my young cousin, when my young cousin got out of reach and fell down a tall stairwell.

Needless to say, my Grandma was torn up, but she did what she was ordained to, and took the fallen child to the ER. Once my aunt got there, the doctor had decided that the child was fine, but he "prescribed" a beer and/or wine cooler to my grandmother.

This is where it get's "Tom"y. My grandmother spent 3 hours trying to get hold of the local Catholic priest to see if she would be damned for drinking a beer. After an hour of waiting and no replys, she went ahead and drank a wine cooler. Having done it on her own, without the sanction of the church, 10 minutes everyday is spent between asking forgiveness for her sin and Living her life as well as she can (with the exception of the XFL).

The ol' waiting game.

Hey, guys! Did you hear? There's a recession! The job market's pretty crappy! Strike that, it's extremely crappy!

I finally got all my stuff together to apply for a job. After 3 hours of reworking my resume ("But Tommy, couldn't you have just made a new one in a shorter amount of time?" "Yes." "But why di-" "Shut it."), It was all ready to go, so I sent it out with some sweet cover letters to my future decliners. Then I realized that I had lost an entire job description for one of my previous jobs. Where'd it go? I don't know. Is there any way to fix that? Send them an updated resume, apologizing for the craptastic mistake?

Think I'll just eat some more PB&J.

The obligatory year end/new year post.

I suppose if I truly am making an effort to post here on a regular basis, I'm supposed to do one of these. There's no system in place, so here's some stream of consciousness.

2008- Some good damn times were had.

Improv- Whether shows I saw or was involved in, my biggest regret in the realm of improv, (possibly the whole year) was that I couldn't do more. But the main reason I couldn't was another part of what made the year so great:

Election 2008- OK, so Obama didn't win MO. He won the presidency. I like to also build my own self esteem up by reminding myself that I did work for a whole month in Minnesota, which he did win, and 4 days in Ohio, which he also won. Here in MO, I also worked on getting Jay Nixon in too, so all in all, not that bad a year. The results on election night mattered more to me than they ever have, and I can't decide if it's due to the historic nature of it (not just "yay, a black man was elected"[though some of that, sure], but more "yay, at least 4 years without a complete douche in office") or just the blood sweat and tears given to the campaign. Either way, a great year, with lots to look forward to.

Job stuffs- The end of the year let me down a little bit in terms of what I was expecting to be starting vs. what happened (or didn't[yet]), but I know that 2009 holds much promise for me. The job itself was fantastic, though. I worked with great people with whom I will probably remain friends for life. The people I worked with were the most diverse group I had ever been around, and for that I am also much the wiser. I did end up losing some weight from all the walking and talking, but then immediately put it back on over the holidays. So it goes.

That's all I care to reminice about, now to 2009-

-I'm going to attempt to live mildly healthier on a day to day basis. Not sure yet what all it might entail, but I've got a few ideas. Ideas that will not be posted here because until I decide and commit, I don't want y'all holding me accountable for ideas. You can, however, post some suggestions below.

-I would like to see more of the country (USA, not Green Acres). Odds are decent that this could be accomplished through a new job, but if not, I'm definitely going to look more into at least visiting places where I've never been, probably crashing the occasional couch.

-I would like to see more of another country. I've only been 4-5 miles into Canada, and relatively close to Mexico. This can not stand. This will not stand. Look out world, I'm curious and moderately resourceful.

-I need to keep in contact with people better, on a number of different levels. Not just the ghosts of Tommy's past, but also current confidants. Don't be surprised to receive the occassional summons for a meal or a drink. For this, you can hold me accountable.

Alright, well, that's my year end/new year Thingy McBlogpost. The only thing I left off, because I thought it had been implied over the last few weeks, was that I'm going to update this more often.

Good luck to you all in the new year.